Post by Kyle Shane on Apr 8, 2012 23:42:07 GMT -5
Scene fades back in to show Kyle Shane, in his apartment. You know what? Fuck it, no elaborate setup this time, Kyle's sitting on his couch, the Light-Heavyweight Title belt's there, there's some weed laid out, but first and foremost Kyle has a universal remote in his hand. And he is flipping, idly through an on demand menu, as he has some video queued up he wants to get to.
Dan Fierce: You vacated it, dropping it onto your opponent at the time, Nathan Saniti.” He hits the rewind again. “…dropping it onto your opponent…” Rewind. “…onto your opponent…” Rewind. “…onto”
Kyle Shane: Oh NO! Dan Fierce's knockout shot on me was that... I misunderstood a miniscule point he was making! I thought he was bitching that I lost the title to Nathan Saniti, but really he had a bug up his ass because after I beat a piece of crap who had no business in a title match I vacated the title and laid it over top of him. THAT CERTAINLY SHUT ME UP. Except for the part where nobody even gives a crap anymore, Dan? No, you know what? Even if I got the wording wrong, the point you were trying to make off me is that, I did the Hart Title a disservice because I held on to it then vacated it. And, you say, that that's the kind of thinking I don't bring to the Light-Heavyweight Title. Except that I already explained why I even vacated it. I think it's hilarious that you keep bringing that shit up when it has nothing to do in the here or now. But since you wanted to quibble over my not getting your words right I am sorry, Dan. I'm sorry I thought you were trying to credit Nathan Saniti with a title win when, in fact, you were just jealous that I was vacating a title because I HAD ALREADY BEATEN EVERY COMPETITOR FOR IT AND WANTED TO MOVE UP IN THE RANKINGS. You know you keep talking about how you're going to move on to be the World Champion but you haven't actually held an entire division down in quite a while, if you ever actually have (refresh my memory, mister I Beat Raziel, I Beat Ranma Saotome, when's the last time you actually WON A FUCKING TITLE?!) The way it works is, you establish yourself as champion by winning the title, beat all the competition and MOVE UP. That's what I did with the Hart Title, since you simply can't let go of it. Notice, Dan, for all you talking about how much I brag about my accomplishments, how little I've actually done? I'm not the one still talking about X-W-F titles and rivalries... YOU ARE. But since you won't shut the fuck up about it, here you go again. I beat Nio for the Hart Title. I beat Scott Charlotte, The Next Warrior and Nathan Saniti, all it's top contenders, within the span of a month. I knew that if I stayed in that diviion, faced with rematches against those lackluster dullards I just named, I would get bored. I asked management for more competition. They told me to vacate the Hart Title, so I did. You want to pitch a fit and say that shows how little I respect the titles I held? You want to find fault in me being hungry, unlike you, me doing things in my career and showing a continued drive to be the best? You're a fucking idiot.
A CONTINUED DRIVE, Dan. Meaning I won't slack off for a few weeks here and there, I don't ever, "not do my job". I push myself harder week after week to do my best and fight to the top of the rankings. You? You float around directionless until you find some other ideology to latch on to. First you disdain the Light-Heavyweight Title, then you'll be an amazing champion and you can't wait to beat me for it! You want to be a revolutionary one day and organize all your peers into the Million Faggot March like the next Malcolm X, then you're off to Milan or LA or Poughkeepsie or whatever K-Mart back alley you're promoting your "controversial fashion line". You do not, for ONE FUCKING SECOND, EVER, Dan, EVER hold true to any one ideal. You do not ever really apply yourself, really show any fire. You want to spew weak lines like "I'm Dan FUCKING Fierce, this bitch has claws!"
And you act like I... NEED to put my Light-Heavyweight Title up against you? Why, to prove some point? No. You didn't make me run scared from you, you didn't prove any point. I proved a point. Dan you HAD your shot at the Light-Heavyweight Title AND.
YOU.
LOST.
Remember? Remember that, because you got beat because "you didn't do your job" well guess what Dan, should I actually reward somebody who talks about how he doesn't put effort in sometimes, and oh that's just life so that makes it okay. Should I reward that with a title shot? IF this was an office and you were the guy who called out on Friday and missed an important meeting about selecting which salesman was eligible for a quota, but you came in after the fact and said "Hey I want that extra money, hook me up"... do you think THAT should be allowed? IT'S THE SAME FUCKING THING DAN. You lost to me one time and I'm sorry, but even when you showed up this week you didn't give me one single fucking reason to think different, you didn't show up and wow my socks off, all you did was bitch about Nathan Saniti once again, threaten me and say stupid shit like "What are you going to do when this bitch shoves her foot up your ass and beats you" You love to play what if games, do you Dan? Do you? Hey, what if you didn't distract from every single thing I said about you by ignoring it? What if I, in my promo from Kyle Shane right there available for viewing on the WGWF message boards completely and utterly tore apart everything about you. You think I just addressed your sexuality? Dude, I talked about EVERYTHING about you. Your win-loss record. Your title history. Your lack of accomplishments IN THE RECENT PAST, who gives a fuck if you ever beat Raziel, he went on to be a World Champion and you went on to still suck.
I talked about all that and what did you do? What did you fill seven fucking useless dead air paragraphs with.
"What happens when this loser slaps the taste out of your mouth in front of all these people".
"What happens when I beat you and Nick Ryan is forced to give me a shot at your title."
"What happens, what then, what if"
Dan. For the very last time. Shut. The. Fuck. UP. All these questions are meaningless rhetorical fluff that means absolutely nothing to me not only because they mean nothing to me, they don't even mean anything to you, Dan. You didn't answer anything I said about you, you didn't convince anybody you aren't a needy, pretentious, wishy-washy, crybaby loser. All you did was snarl and preen and threaten. You sir are whistling past a fucking graveyard and you should be because I am going to BURY YOU, Dan. I'm not just going to beat your ass I'm going to enjoy snapping that limp wrist in two as I dislocate your arm and beat you with the stump.
You keep saying that I'm a closet case and dude it makes me laugh every fucking time. Because you think ascribing sexuality to me means something.
You, Dan, are SO into your over the top gimmick that you think anybody else is in denial. You think that anybody who's gay or bi has to be as out and flaming as you. You think everybody who's ever had a gay experience has to be a makeup and nail painted Rocky Horror corsetted full on spectacle because that's the only way you relate to the world. And that's why you're DAN FIERCE, the fucking gimmick. That's all you are Dan, you're a stereotype, a bad gimmick, you've turned who you are into something so overblown and ridiculous that it's not real anymore and you don't recognize what IS real. You think I'm a closet case Dan? Fuck it. Whatever you think. I'll admit that I don't have a steady girlfriend. I'll admit before that Neptune and I crossed boundaries and did things together that make ultra hetero alpha males sneer in disgust. But you think I'm in denial of who I am? No Dan because not everybody wants to be you or looks at the whole gender identity in your way. You're projecting your beliefs onto me, and in your own way you sound just as fucking ignorant and retarded as ANY bigot who's ever discriminated against poor you.
And once again, I use the word faggot because that's how you act. IT's not a slur. It's because you're being a fucking idiotic faggot. That is not me being in denial or being a self-hating fairy.
Also, you're predictable as fuck, I knew you'd use the closet case line. Do I have to spoon feed you your lines from now on? You're making fucking you up beyond easy, this is childs play.
And again, you miss the point. When I said fuck worrying about Nick Ryan, you have to look at me as pleasing Caesar... and I can't actually believe I have to explain this to a grown man, so I'll slow down. I... wasn't actually... CALLING MYSELF CAESAR.
Got that, want me to run it back? I half expected you to reference yourself as Caligula, you fucking weirdo. I never said I WAS Caesar but I am the top of this division, Dan. Facts are facts. I've done more in this industry than you. Oh, I'm sorry, you don't want me to talk about my past accomplishments anymore, and you beat Chris Page! That's amazing. The same Chris Page that went out in his last match on his back like a bitch, that Chris Page?
Yeah not impressed.
What have you done LATELY, Dan. That's the question. That's what's made this all so laughable. Talk about beating Ranma and Raz and whoever else the fuck but what's it gotten you? Did you get any title shots from it? But you talk about ME beating nobodies? Dan who did you face in the tournament. Isabelle and Pussycat. Wow. Tough opposition there.
Get over yourself, man. You're nowhere near as unique, talented or original as you think you are, and you are nowhere NEAR my league.
Another asskicking is coming your way because as you just proved to me, you're strictly on easy mode. I hit you with the toughest talk I could and gave you a lot to answer you, you just bitched about my use of your words and asked what if.
You fail, Dan.
Now and always, you fucking fail.
But hey at least you did your job this time, right? Your job of putting people over and being a mediocre, freakshow sissy that couldn't fight his way out of a paper bag.
I'm closing this out now. I've had a lot of fun fucking you up yet again but seriously? Don't hold your breath for that title shot, if I have my way. Title shots are for winners, in the ring and in life.
Peace, we out.[/b]
And with that, he tosses the remote and stands, walking away. Time to go take a shit, using Dan Fierce's clothing line in lieu of toilet paper.
Oh like it's good for anything else.
Dan Fierce: You vacated it, dropping it onto your opponent at the time, Nathan Saniti.” He hits the rewind again. “…dropping it onto your opponent…” Rewind. “…onto your opponent…” Rewind. “…onto”
Kyle Shane: Oh NO! Dan Fierce's knockout shot on me was that... I misunderstood a miniscule point he was making! I thought he was bitching that I lost the title to Nathan Saniti, but really he had a bug up his ass because after I beat a piece of crap who had no business in a title match I vacated the title and laid it over top of him. THAT CERTAINLY SHUT ME UP. Except for the part where nobody even gives a crap anymore, Dan? No, you know what? Even if I got the wording wrong, the point you were trying to make off me is that, I did the Hart Title a disservice because I held on to it then vacated it. And, you say, that that's the kind of thinking I don't bring to the Light-Heavyweight Title. Except that I already explained why I even vacated it. I think it's hilarious that you keep bringing that shit up when it has nothing to do in the here or now. But since you wanted to quibble over my not getting your words right I am sorry, Dan. I'm sorry I thought you were trying to credit Nathan Saniti with a title win when, in fact, you were just jealous that I was vacating a title because I HAD ALREADY BEATEN EVERY COMPETITOR FOR IT AND WANTED TO MOVE UP IN THE RANKINGS. You know you keep talking about how you're going to move on to be the World Champion but you haven't actually held an entire division down in quite a while, if you ever actually have (refresh my memory, mister I Beat Raziel, I Beat Ranma Saotome, when's the last time you actually WON A FUCKING TITLE?!) The way it works is, you establish yourself as champion by winning the title, beat all the competition and MOVE UP. That's what I did with the Hart Title, since you simply can't let go of it. Notice, Dan, for all you talking about how much I brag about my accomplishments, how little I've actually done? I'm not the one still talking about X-W-F titles and rivalries... YOU ARE. But since you won't shut the fuck up about it, here you go again. I beat Nio for the Hart Title. I beat Scott Charlotte, The Next Warrior and Nathan Saniti, all it's top contenders, within the span of a month. I knew that if I stayed in that diviion, faced with rematches against those lackluster dullards I just named, I would get bored. I asked management for more competition. They told me to vacate the Hart Title, so I did. You want to pitch a fit and say that shows how little I respect the titles I held? You want to find fault in me being hungry, unlike you, me doing things in my career and showing a continued drive to be the best? You're a fucking idiot.
A CONTINUED DRIVE, Dan. Meaning I won't slack off for a few weeks here and there, I don't ever, "not do my job". I push myself harder week after week to do my best and fight to the top of the rankings. You? You float around directionless until you find some other ideology to latch on to. First you disdain the Light-Heavyweight Title, then you'll be an amazing champion and you can't wait to beat me for it! You want to be a revolutionary one day and organize all your peers into the Million Faggot March like the next Malcolm X, then you're off to Milan or LA or Poughkeepsie or whatever K-Mart back alley you're promoting your "controversial fashion line". You do not, for ONE FUCKING SECOND, EVER, Dan, EVER hold true to any one ideal. You do not ever really apply yourself, really show any fire. You want to spew weak lines like "I'm Dan FUCKING Fierce, this bitch has claws!"
And you act like I... NEED to put my Light-Heavyweight Title up against you? Why, to prove some point? No. You didn't make me run scared from you, you didn't prove any point. I proved a point. Dan you HAD your shot at the Light-Heavyweight Title AND.
YOU.
LOST.
Remember? Remember that, because you got beat because "you didn't do your job" well guess what Dan, should I actually reward somebody who talks about how he doesn't put effort in sometimes, and oh that's just life so that makes it okay. Should I reward that with a title shot? IF this was an office and you were the guy who called out on Friday and missed an important meeting about selecting which salesman was eligible for a quota, but you came in after the fact and said "Hey I want that extra money, hook me up"... do you think THAT should be allowed? IT'S THE SAME FUCKING THING DAN. You lost to me one time and I'm sorry, but even when you showed up this week you didn't give me one single fucking reason to think different, you didn't show up and wow my socks off, all you did was bitch about Nathan Saniti once again, threaten me and say stupid shit like "What are you going to do when this bitch shoves her foot up your ass and beats you" You love to play what if games, do you Dan? Do you? Hey, what if you didn't distract from every single thing I said about you by ignoring it? What if I, in my promo from Kyle Shane right there available for viewing on the WGWF message boards completely and utterly tore apart everything about you. You think I just addressed your sexuality? Dude, I talked about EVERYTHING about you. Your win-loss record. Your title history. Your lack of accomplishments IN THE RECENT PAST, who gives a fuck if you ever beat Raziel, he went on to be a World Champion and you went on to still suck.
I talked about all that and what did you do? What did you fill seven fucking useless dead air paragraphs with.
"What happens when this loser slaps the taste out of your mouth in front of all these people".
"What happens when I beat you and Nick Ryan is forced to give me a shot at your title."
"What happens, what then, what if"
Dan. For the very last time. Shut. The. Fuck. UP. All these questions are meaningless rhetorical fluff that means absolutely nothing to me not only because they mean nothing to me, they don't even mean anything to you, Dan. You didn't answer anything I said about you, you didn't convince anybody you aren't a needy, pretentious, wishy-washy, crybaby loser. All you did was snarl and preen and threaten. You sir are whistling past a fucking graveyard and you should be because I am going to BURY YOU, Dan. I'm not just going to beat your ass I'm going to enjoy snapping that limp wrist in two as I dislocate your arm and beat you with the stump.
You keep saying that I'm a closet case and dude it makes me laugh every fucking time. Because you think ascribing sexuality to me means something.
You, Dan, are SO into your over the top gimmick that you think anybody else is in denial. You think that anybody who's gay or bi has to be as out and flaming as you. You think everybody who's ever had a gay experience has to be a makeup and nail painted Rocky Horror corsetted full on spectacle because that's the only way you relate to the world. And that's why you're DAN FIERCE, the fucking gimmick. That's all you are Dan, you're a stereotype, a bad gimmick, you've turned who you are into something so overblown and ridiculous that it's not real anymore and you don't recognize what IS real. You think I'm a closet case Dan? Fuck it. Whatever you think. I'll admit that I don't have a steady girlfriend. I'll admit before that Neptune and I crossed boundaries and did things together that make ultra hetero alpha males sneer in disgust. But you think I'm in denial of who I am? No Dan because not everybody wants to be you or looks at the whole gender identity in your way. You're projecting your beliefs onto me, and in your own way you sound just as fucking ignorant and retarded as ANY bigot who's ever discriminated against poor you.
And once again, I use the word faggot because that's how you act. IT's not a slur. It's because you're being a fucking idiotic faggot. That is not me being in denial or being a self-hating fairy.
Also, you're predictable as fuck, I knew you'd use the closet case line. Do I have to spoon feed you your lines from now on? You're making fucking you up beyond easy, this is childs play.
And again, you miss the point. When I said fuck worrying about Nick Ryan, you have to look at me as pleasing Caesar... and I can't actually believe I have to explain this to a grown man, so I'll slow down. I... wasn't actually... CALLING MYSELF CAESAR.
Got that, want me to run it back? I half expected you to reference yourself as Caligula, you fucking weirdo. I never said I WAS Caesar but I am the top of this division, Dan. Facts are facts. I've done more in this industry than you. Oh, I'm sorry, you don't want me to talk about my past accomplishments anymore, and you beat Chris Page! That's amazing. The same Chris Page that went out in his last match on his back like a bitch, that Chris Page?
Yeah not impressed.
What have you done LATELY, Dan. That's the question. That's what's made this all so laughable. Talk about beating Ranma and Raz and whoever else the fuck but what's it gotten you? Did you get any title shots from it? But you talk about ME beating nobodies? Dan who did you face in the tournament. Isabelle and Pussycat. Wow. Tough opposition there.
Get over yourself, man. You're nowhere near as unique, talented or original as you think you are, and you are nowhere NEAR my league.
Another asskicking is coming your way because as you just proved to me, you're strictly on easy mode. I hit you with the toughest talk I could and gave you a lot to answer you, you just bitched about my use of your words and asked what if.
You fail, Dan.
Now and always, you fucking fail.
But hey at least you did your job this time, right? Your job of putting people over and being a mediocre, freakshow sissy that couldn't fight his way out of a paper bag.
I'm closing this out now. I've had a lot of fun fucking you up yet again but seriously? Don't hold your breath for that title shot, if I have my way. Title shots are for winners, in the ring and in life.
Peace, we out.[/b]
And with that, he tosses the remote and stands, walking away. Time to go take a shit, using Dan Fierce's clothing line in lieu of toilet paper.
Oh like it's good for anything else.