[JMont/Atara] JMont, Atara and Molly....Oh My!!! [Collab RP]
Jul 30, 2023 15:15:22 GMT -5
Jim Caedus and Alex Richards like this
Post by jmonttwizted on Jul 30, 2023 15:15:22 GMT -5
NO ONE SAW THIS COMING!
[When everyone thinks of JMont and Atara they don't hear the word TEAM. They think Atty texting Mia, snitching on the current antics of Joseph at the Rabbit or they think JMont throwing shade on James Raven to antagonize Atara.]
Has Hell frozen over?
Has Grado gotten laid?
Did Chris Page get his senior citizen discount on Cialis?
Did Flash Rotten order 3 Super Sized meals instead of 4?
[So many questions to ask, but the main question, the important question...]
[....How did JMont and Atara come to terms and agree to team in the Summer Madness Turmoil match?]
LIGHTS
CAMERA
ACTION
Velvet Rabbit Las Vegas
3000 South Las Vegas Blvd
Las Vegas, NV 89109
[Pulling up to the front of the Velvet Rabbit is a one of a kind piece of machinery. A 2023 Bugatti Chiron. Sure Candice Page has 3 million to spend on this but it's not her. As the car parks right in front of the door, the driver side suicide door swings up and open. One leg steps out and a Gucci loafer hits pavement soon followed by its pair. As the door closes, the visage of JMont appears heading to the entrance. Not giving a shit about where he parked his car, JMont parts between security with little fuss despite the guards' known hostility towards him. Not so much as a sniff of a security check was offered and Joe passed in harassed into his home away from home.]
[The Velvet Rabbit is one of the hottest clubs in all of Vegas. The first floor has a few bars located in good centralized locations. You also have banquette and bottle service available. And that is something JMont has spent a large amount of money on throughout the year. But the best part is that it has full access to VooDoo’s Black Magic Sex Shop for your late night needs of erotic clothing, lotions, and more. Something that Atty has taken advantage of to keep the sex life going in her relationship with James. But you cannot forget about the second floor. You have a VIP stage that displays a see through glass catwalk that can be viewed from the first floor. And to top it off, you have Sky Boxes and Honey Suites available. Sure JMont knows a lot about this place, but that doesn't mean he gets into too much trouble here, or does it? There is one person here tonight who will gladly pull out her phone and send a text message to Mia if JMont does something out of line or disrespectful to his relationship. And if you have no idea who this woman is, then you really just need to walk into a 4 way intersection, and stand there while a bus, taxi, car and a man riding a bike all hit you. This woman is none other than…….]
[If there was one thing Atara Raven didn't need, it was the assistance of VooDoo's Black Magic Shop. She was Aphrodite Incarnate, the Goddess, arguably the backbone of the Velvet Rabbit, but most importantly, she could fuck on beat. Something Joseph Montuori knew nothing about, obviously from the amount of time he spent trying to find rhythm from the various Does he spent his nights with.]
Allegedly.
[If there was any further need for testament to her ability to entrance, enthrall, and beguile the masses on a whim, one would have to look no further than a single stage on the upper floor of the Rabbit where the Grecian slinked, slithered, shimmied, and swirled for a steadily growing mob having realized their Goddess had made an impromptu manifestation inside what she deemed one of her temples.]
[While we all know that Atara has had dreams of J Mont, she will never admit it. And who can fault her. Most of the DOES that work at the Rabbit have all had crushes or sexual thoughts about JMont. But they all know that he is off limits now because of Mia. But in the meantime, JMont is walking around the Rabbit, shaking hands with everyone like he is the mayor of Las Vegas. Then, out of nowhere, Daniel Ramsey appears and heads towards his Uncle.]
Daniel Ramsey: Uncle Joe!!!!!
JMont: Nephew, what's going on? How are things with Brooke going?
Daniel Ramsey: Hard to think about Brooke when the Greek Goddess is above.
[The look JMont just gave Daniel is one of “You got something good at home, dont fuck it up for the greeks.”]
JMont: I don’t see anything of Goddess in here Daniel.
Daniel Ramsey: Look up Uncle Joe.
[JMont looks up to humor his nephew, and when he does, he looks back at Daniel and wants to slap the living shit out of him.]
JMont: Nephew, please, for the love of god, do not worship that. She will text Brooke before you know it.
Daniel Ramsey: I will not get in trouble Uncle.
JMont: What is so goddess about Atara?
[JMont looks up again, but this time, Atara spots him looking at her. Atara does the impersonation of having a cellphone and texting Mia.]
JMont: [Yelling.] I bet you wont come down here and text her right in front of me.
[One dance had become two, two had become three, three into four and it seemed as long music played Atty wouldn't leave the floor. It was pure stamina, the ability to go open to close. Start to finish, Something else Joseph didn't know about, except for finishing…
…..early. According to a text from Mia.]
Allegedly.
[Nonetheless, the crowd had grown to a breaking point and her stage was at capacity. It didn't make it hard for her Aegean blue orbs to spot that peanut headed walking muscle mound chatting with that government check Austin Ramsey called son. Atty knew where a Ramsey was, there was mischief and where a JMont was…there was a man whore about to commit adultery.]
[Unknown to Joe she had already subtly maneuvered and improvised herself, or her boobs rather into an eager face and mid motor boat and picked a pocketed phone and snapped a photo. Well practiced Twitter thumbs and fired it off to Mia already. No thought as to if this stranger would call later.]
She hoped he did.
[No thought to whether or not it might cause problems with her friend and her boyfriend.]
She hoped it did.
[Just the pure adulterated need to make sure Joe didn't do Joe shit and hurt Mia. Back on her feet and dancing again, it was mere moments before the two locked eyes from their respective places in the rabbit. Greece looked out to Shitaly and that's when she made her gesture, and that's when what made Atty a Goddess took hold. Be it innate masculine need to procreate or just the caveman instinct to club a woman…they always took notice and they always opened their big dumb mouths.]
[Not one to back down, Atty grabbed her crotch and fired right back, "Suck my Dick, Malaka!"]
[JMont looks around because he knows that there is no way that Atty is talking to him like that. JMont then taps this heavy set guy on the shoulder who resembles Fat Man Rotten.]
JMont: Hey, The Greek Non Goddess woman up there has a message for you. I think you missed it the first time she yelled it out.
[The Fat Man Rotten lookalike looks up at Atty with a big smile on his face. Looking at her like she is a triple cheeseburger, with 2 pounds of bacon, 21 pickles, 10 pieces of cheese and holding the lettuce and tomato.]
[In the span of time it had taken for this very apt description of what Joe taste when he eats Page's ass to come to fruition, the huddled mass around Atty had also turned and locked bewildered gazes on the man who had interrupted what has become a really nice dance number.]
"Elllla! Atty exclaimed, clapping her hands in emphasis. "I'm talking to you, Jersey Shore! You just gonna stand there and gawk? This costs money."
[Almost in unison the crowd grumbled and aired their own grievances.]
[JMont taps the Fat Man on his shoulder and gives him the finger, but not the one he normally gives most people. He gave him the one minute finger, i will be right back one. JMont looks up at Atty as he has had enough of her tonight and the night has only begun. As JMont makes his way towards the stairs, he is flying up them like he is trying out for the football team. Before you know it, he is on the second floor and not too far away from Atty. JMont reaches into his pocket, and this is where things could get dicey. Security never patted him down at the front door, so who knows what JMont walked in with. But, everyone knows that the pockets of JMont are always flowing with money. When he pulls his hand out, he has a crisp brand new……..]
ONE DOLLAR BILL
[JMont makes his way towards the stage that Atty is on and as he approaches her, he can't help but give her that evil smile of his. Usually, this is where JMont throws ones in the air and it looks like Hurricane Gloria hit the stage. But not this time. Giving a big fuck you to Greece, JMont extends his arm out and holds out the dollar bill for Atty.]
JMont: This is for you, but I need change!
[Tantrum Joe, Tantrum Austin, Tantrum Bieber, Atty had seen it a thousand times and each time they thought walking fast with their chests puffed with their little beady eyes all pinched and squinched somehow made them all the more intimidating. She would have sooner run from a prancing bird of paradise and no sooner had that little old man grin crawled into his own pout, glistening pink, had thinned and curled in return.]
[Hand on her hip, Atty sauntered to the stage's edge and leaned down to non ceremoniously pluck the dollar from his hand and stuffing it in her bra with the college fund "Little Mia" would never have.]
"You make change at the counter Dove, but don't worry, it's not like you can find Wendy's to spend it anyway," she cooed before returning her pole.
[Pausing, Atty's rasp permeated through the cacophony of the club's noise for a final stab.]
"Would love to chat, but my public is waiting. You should be hearing from Mia soon …"
[As JMont reaches into his pocket again, he grabs another dollar bill. But this time, as he pulls out the dollar bill, a small bag of molly pills falls out of his pocket and onto the stage. As he goes to grab them, his hand is nearly pinched off by the four inch platform of one of Atty's knee boots.]
[Clamped between her foot and stage, the Goddess slid the bag out his reach while looking down on Joe from her vantage.]
"Oooh, she's already called I take? This a peace offering Joseph?"
JMont: No she has not called yet. I just fumbled the bag of Molly like I was Hot Hands Haynes from Little Giants.
Atty tilted her befuddled mouthing the words Little Giants, "The fuck is Little Giants? How old are you? Sounds like a Terry Marshall reference….or whatever. Shits illegal Joe, think I'mma confiscate," lifting her foot, Atty bent at the waist to pick the bag up for herself.
[JMont reaches into his back pocket and pulls out his IPhone 15 Plus. Yes, you heard that right. Not even in the market yet, but J Mont has one. Talk about having good connections.]
JMont: I'm calling my attorney to let him know that Atty is up to no good tonight. Preparing him for any bullshit you try to throw my way. But remember, you might be Patrick Mahomes, but I am Justin Jefferson. I got the best hands.
[Atty remained still, her ass up to the world and just stared in disbelief. In less than a minute Joe acknowledged a fumble and claimed to have the best hands. Was this effin Twitter. The pause was long enough for a product placement ad apparently and from behind her Atty heard one a disgruntled voice.]
"You gonna shake ass or what!"
[For whatever reason, the fates aligned and Atty dropped her to look back between her legs and Joseph peeked around to also look through her legs at the heckler and in unison both shouted back.]
"Shut the fuck up we're talking here!"
[Immediately after they were staring daggers into each other.]
JMont: Why are you looking at me like I'm a piece of Kobe Beef?
[And for you slow, dumb ass people like Jim Caedus, Kobe Beef is the most expensive beef in the world.]
"You mean like an overpriced and overrated piece of livestock easily herded into a slaughterhouse for my benefit…I dunno Joe. Doesn't sound like you at all," Atara replied.
JMont: Only thing that is overrated around here is Peter Vaughn and I'm going to show him on Night 2 of Summer Madness just what the JMont Express is all about!
CHOO! CHOO!
"Pfft, Joe. You're American. It's a slow ass, dated, and failing railway system but I'm sure that wins points with Biden…" Atara chided.
JMont: Let me take you to school for a minute. The JMont Express is also known as The Shanghai Maglev, which is the fastest train at 268 miles per hour. And you cannot mention The Chinese and Biden in the same sentence.
"I don't know if you noticed Thomas the Tank , but I've been bent over at 45 degrees in 8 inch heels for a few minutes now. My legs are starting to hurt, I don't have time for whatever PBS lesson you picked up while Mia made your breakfast this morning," Atara snipped.
JMont: Just give me my bag back and I will be on my way Gumby.
"Fine," she replied with a shrug, Atara let go of the bag but not before picking a pill up and popping it into her mouth. My time is up anyway….
JMont: Oh yeah, just like movie. 2 Can Play That Game Miss Vivica A Raven.
[JMont reaches into the bag and grabs a pill. He pops it into his mouth as well, and places the rest of the bag in his pocket so Daniel wont know he has it with him.]
JMont: Take that!
"SECURITY! THIS MAN IS SOLICITING DRUGS!" Atty screamed pointing to Joseph before hauling ass off stage through the crowd cackling. Taking just a second to punch her heckler in the dick, "And assault!"
[JMont looks around but at least there is no more HALE. He left Austin high and dry and the rest of the security here is weak as puppy piss. JMont sees Atty taking off like she is Tyreek Hill breaking a few tackles. So, being a former standout Safety like he was back in the day, JMont takes off through the crowd and using his chiseled 255 pound body, he barrels through everyone and catches up to Atty.]
JMont: What is your problem?
"You're fake Joseph," Atara clipped. "You're bad business. Tired of you running my husband's name in the dirt, tired of you using my friend for your bs "I'm good a person, look at me," publicist whatever. Chris might not see it. Mia might not see it, despite my attempts to show her, but I see it. And I am doing something….whoa….
Why do those security guys look like candy striped elephants?
[JMont gets into a fighting stance. Looking around,he doesn’t see an elephant, but he sees something a little different.]
JMont: How did a camel get into the Velvet Rabbit?
Atara snorted followed by a giggle. "Effin camels…Austin hates camels, shit in my face there's a cam…oh.. oh….fuck the camel. The elephants.
JMont: Oh shit. Are we in the movie Billy Madison? Because I see a Penguin on stage picking up all the ones.
Oblivious to what he said, the effects of this super fast and effective MDMA had taken hold. Atty kept her gaze fixated on the encroaching security elephants, "The elephants are angry Joseph."
JMont: I think we can take these elephants. I already took down our Walrus GM. Bring on the elephants from Ace Ventura.
[Atty gave two thumbs up, clearly not under the influence enough to have lost her sarcasm and took a few steps back before putting a foot to JMonts backside and shoving him forward towards the "elephants.]
"Go get 'em Tiger." She snorted again. "We…pfft. Ain't no we….we….I gotta pee.
JMont: I got a better idea before I get knocked out by a trunk and not the junk in the trunk that Mia has.
[JMont takes a deep breath.]
JMont: Why don’t we be a team and take down all these elephants, camels and penguins?
Atara looked at Joe wide eyed, "Because I love animals! Because I'm wearing panties and pasties….because I have to pee!
JMont: I will be a good teammate and walk you to the bathroom, so you are safe and sound.
"SECURITY! ACE VENTURAS TALKING ASS IS TRYING TO GET ME IN A BATHROOM!"
[JMont looks around again.]
JMont: Dan Marino is here? Laces out god damn it! It’s not that hard, Finkle.
"Τι στο διάολο λες!" Atty looked back at the elephants who seemed to be moving at a snail's pace in this loosely explained acid trip they were on. "Why haven't they trampled you! Where's Ricky! Ricky! Ricky!
….oh look it's an angry snoopy dog."
JMont: Why are you wishing death on your teammate Atty? We can do this together and take down all this wildlife….oh shit….do you see that?
[JMont’s eyes light up. His pupils are dilated thanks to the MOLLY, but that doesn't stop him from seeing what he sees.]
JMont: I’m tagging you in on this one. There is a fuckin Unicorn coming this way and i swear to god, i see Doogie Howser on it.
Overstimulated, overwhelmed, and feeling the increasing pressure of a growing bladder, Atara dropped her shoulders to throw her head back, "Fiiiine. I'll take the Unicorn….but I'm going to pee when I'm done!"
[She started towards what she assumed was Joe's unicorn, when in reality it was probably an old stationary carousel horse but who knows. She cut her eyes to Joe, "....better invite me to effin wedding also."]
JMont: That unicorn stands no chance. And you already know you're a bridesmaid, so that's an automatic invite. [JMont looks directly at Atty with his wide ass eyes.] Team Atty Mont. Wait that doesn't sound right. Mia would kill me for that. Team Montaraven? Team Molly?
Atara scoffed, "Una Fazza…stg Joe…are you sure you're Italian?"
[JMont looks at Atty, but the look he is giving her is one that Fat Rotten would be giving.]
JMont: Atty…..why is your nose like a Canoli?
[Atara had made her way to this Unicorn carousel horse thing and with arms stretched wide pressed firmly against it. Cool to the touch, she was lost to the myriad of sensations she was feeling and Joe's words were but the faintest sounds in her mind.]
"I don't know Joe, everything is so absurd right now. Not as absurd as the possibility of 8 other teams ever beating us, but almost…maybe you're hungry," she shrugged.
JMont: Maybe I need to look up the GPS on my phone and make my way to The Empire Room. I don’t know which way to go to be honest. ROCKET RACCOON, be my GUARDIAN and help me get to the Empire Room with my favorite Super Power Girl Atty.
"Pfft….Wonder Woman. Marvel can suck my asshole Joe. Disney too." Atara clapped, turning to follow trash panda and new friend Mario Montuori.
JMont: If you need a new friend, I think I see Marlon Brando over there. I believe he was the German guy in that movie, The Young Lions.
Atara's brows furrowed, "Brando as a German makes as much sense as Cassette Collective as a name clicking with anyone but Terry Marshall. BROTHER, let me tell you something BROTHER, no one knows what the fuck a cassette is. You'd all find someone who thinks they had a shot at Madness….
…..BROTHER!"
[JMont gets in position like a QB waiting for someone to hike him a MILLER lite.]
JMont: HUT! HUT! HIKE!
[Nothing happens and J Mont is standing there as confused as Austin Ramsey is when someone asks him what 2 times 2 is.]
JMont: This has me thinking. The LFL has a football team called The Pride, but yet we have these guys' names Frank Patrick Venable and Joule Ortiz repping that same name. Makes me wonder if they took a chapter out of the movie Juwanna Man and dressed as women just to play some football because they truly are a bunch of pussies.
Atara rolled her eyes, "You just used a dated term after I called someone old and dated Joe and um, I have a pussy. Way to compliment our opposition…stg."
JMont: What did you just say? I was distracted by those 2 weird people that are still wearing masks like the Corona Virus is still around. It’s not a mystery anymore you morons, take the mask off so we can see how stupid you really look. But one man that needs to keep the mask on is Mac Bane. That ugly old stupid bastard.
Blue eyes rolled, " Corona is still around Joe and what if they look better than you?"
JMont: But what about MILLER lite?
Atara shrugged, "It's just cheap shit American beer. Ain't nobody got time for that except for maybe chicken shit mystery people who can't afford a photographer? I don't know."
JMont: I think Bam has a sponsorship with MILLER lite or is it the AOUV…….
"No AOUV is the new corona variant, I'm sure but who's keeping track of corona anymore? You didn't even know it was still a thing…."
JMont: I saw Toddy the other night counting all the Corona she was drinking. She was sure putting on a SHOW and STEALING all the thunder from the DOES. Maybe they need to hire the Guardians Protection Services around here.
J Mont: I'm really scared of guys named Jay and Alex. Wait, do you hear that Jeopardy theme Atty?
"Not really, I'm still stuck on Toddy stealing the show, she had to marry Austin to make herself seem slightly interesting…"
JMont: The last time Toddy used Molly, I swear she ran around acting like a Princess Warrior or was it a Kiwi Warrior? Fuck, why cant i remember anything right now?
"Joe…Dougie Howser Unicorn guy brought White Castle…."
JMont: I got a better idea. If we can win the WGWF Tag Titles together, I will BIGGIE size any meal from WENDY’S that you want.
Sure you will Joe….sure you will.
JMont: I really need to go home. This has been a crazy night. I will talk to you soon, partner. And remember, team MAGNA GRAECIA is winning the tag gold.
"Mmmhmm, Magna Carta and goodnight to you…" Atty finished squeezing the carousel unicorn as Joe headed out.