Post by Jocelyn Camden on Mar 11, 2019 8:46:20 GMT -5
Do I need this? No. Do I want this? …that’s even debatable.
Am I going to give this all I’ve got? You bet your sweet arse I will!
Wrestling has been the last thing from my mind for years. I’ve moved past it. My life is so much better now than it was 8 years ago when I needed a job and money in order to survive. Instead of being a fuckin’ street urchin, I’m now a daytime television star. I operate my own winery. My businesses CV continues to grow as my interests expand.
So why I am doing this? Fuck, I don’t know. Ego, maybe? The idea that a “one last, final, absolutely final, no seriously this time” event without Jocelyn Camden must have been too much for me. I have no idea what I’m getting into, but I know that, without me, this show probably wouldn’t have gotten off the ground, and since WGWF DID pay my bills for so many year, I decided, what the fuck, let’s do this.
Stacked card, many big names coming out of the woodwork, and with Jocelyn Camden coming out of retirement, clearly a big name has been booked to face me for this very special occasion. Who am I paired against? Tomoko Hanahara, maybe, so I can finally try to avenge my loss from our historic Last Woman Standing Match? How about Chris Page, with whom I had an absolutely historic rivalry? Maybe Hunter Ryan, my first real feud, and the man I beat to win my first ever WGWF World Championship? Or maybe they dragged Centurion’s old ass out of whatever dumpster he’s residing in these days.
Nope. Rod Frazier. Rod Fucking Frazier, who I had to remind myself many times this past week that he is, in fact, not Andre Dixon but someone else all together. Rod Frazier is the one that used to beat up Alyssa Ferro and win a bunch of TV Titles but then would collapse anytime he would sniff a main event.
I think that pretty much shows what the WGWF things of me now adays. After losing to Star, Anathema, Tomoko, Isabelle Dejardins…the idea of me being this completely unstoppable woman is now over, and the WGWF doesn’t think I have drawing power anymore. They’ve Nick Page’d me. They consider me a star of a bygone era.
Fuck. That. Shit. I may not be a wrestling superstar anymore, but I’m worthy of a better opponent than Rod Fucking Frazier. Perhaps this is why I decided to come back – to remind everyone that there is still some bad left in this bitch.
Why did you decide to do it, Rod? Why did you take the WGWF up on their offer to wrestle another match? Pride? Something to prove with yourself? Or do you just need the money? Are you working the indie circuit, wrestling Mic Ferrari every weekend in high school gymnasiums in Kentucky? I legit want to know. I honestly haven’t heard your name in years. If someone told me you died, I would have completely believed it- especially considering you always looked like someone who feasted entirely off of Rockstar Energy Drinks and steroids.
Here’s what I can tell you you won’t be doing – beating me. Because there’s no way in hell I’d drag my ass across the Atlantic and put myself back in harms way just to lose to some abject failure whose greatest accomplishment appears to be riding the coat tails of someone much more talented than he is.
…wait…holy shit, I’m wrestling the black Zach Rizza!
Like Rizza, you’re a former tag team champion with a decent reign and a run in a tournament. Like Rizza, you paired yourself up with someone more talented than you are – in this case, Kyle Shane, and in his, Tomoko Hanahara. Like Rizza, the moment that tag team ended, people really stopped giving a shit about you. #ShaneBetterHalf.
What I’m saying, Rod, is that you’re nothing. You’ve always been nothing, and you always will be nothing. Your greatest accomplishment is the fact that you get to look at the lights in Jocelyn Camden’s final wrestling match. That’s at least something, but no one will remember you for it. It’s ok, though – I’ll make it quick, and when we’re done, you can go back to selling autographs at conventions or whatever the fuck you do with your life now. Say Hi to Dr. Emo and Seth Stevens for me. Let Heat and Fire know they’re both still punk bitches. Anyone else you see on that “fight for sandwiches” tour, let them know I’m doing so much better than they are, but if they want to step up for another pay day, they can find my number. I’ll be in London. It won’t be hard to miss me – I’ll be on every television programme and bus stop advertisement in the city.
Oh, and one last thing. You’re welcome. You’re welcome for the nice meal you get to have because I decided to say “yes” to this match. You’re welcome for giving you a little extra exposure so you can slightly increase your booking rate for next weekend. You’re welcome for making you relevant again, because the world knows you could have been fighting Hawaiian Hardhead this weekend, and the entire crowd would have walked out to grab merch and take a piss. At least now they’ll get to see how much you suck.
Peace, bitch!
Am I going to give this all I’ve got? You bet your sweet arse I will!
Wrestling has been the last thing from my mind for years. I’ve moved past it. My life is so much better now than it was 8 years ago when I needed a job and money in order to survive. Instead of being a fuckin’ street urchin, I’m now a daytime television star. I operate my own winery. My businesses CV continues to grow as my interests expand.
So why I am doing this? Fuck, I don’t know. Ego, maybe? The idea that a “one last, final, absolutely final, no seriously this time” event without Jocelyn Camden must have been too much for me. I have no idea what I’m getting into, but I know that, without me, this show probably wouldn’t have gotten off the ground, and since WGWF DID pay my bills for so many year, I decided, what the fuck, let’s do this.
Stacked card, many big names coming out of the woodwork, and with Jocelyn Camden coming out of retirement, clearly a big name has been booked to face me for this very special occasion. Who am I paired against? Tomoko Hanahara, maybe, so I can finally try to avenge my loss from our historic Last Woman Standing Match? How about Chris Page, with whom I had an absolutely historic rivalry? Maybe Hunter Ryan, my first real feud, and the man I beat to win my first ever WGWF World Championship? Or maybe they dragged Centurion’s old ass out of whatever dumpster he’s residing in these days.
Nope. Rod Frazier. Rod Fucking Frazier, who I had to remind myself many times this past week that he is, in fact, not Andre Dixon but someone else all together. Rod Frazier is the one that used to beat up Alyssa Ferro and win a bunch of TV Titles but then would collapse anytime he would sniff a main event.
I think that pretty much shows what the WGWF things of me now adays. After losing to Star, Anathema, Tomoko, Isabelle Dejardins…the idea of me being this completely unstoppable woman is now over, and the WGWF doesn’t think I have drawing power anymore. They’ve Nick Page’d me. They consider me a star of a bygone era.
Fuck. That. Shit. I may not be a wrestling superstar anymore, but I’m worthy of a better opponent than Rod Fucking Frazier. Perhaps this is why I decided to come back – to remind everyone that there is still some bad left in this bitch.
Why did you decide to do it, Rod? Why did you take the WGWF up on their offer to wrestle another match? Pride? Something to prove with yourself? Or do you just need the money? Are you working the indie circuit, wrestling Mic Ferrari every weekend in high school gymnasiums in Kentucky? I legit want to know. I honestly haven’t heard your name in years. If someone told me you died, I would have completely believed it- especially considering you always looked like someone who feasted entirely off of Rockstar Energy Drinks and steroids.
Here’s what I can tell you you won’t be doing – beating me. Because there’s no way in hell I’d drag my ass across the Atlantic and put myself back in harms way just to lose to some abject failure whose greatest accomplishment appears to be riding the coat tails of someone much more talented than he is.
…wait…holy shit, I’m wrestling the black Zach Rizza!
Like Rizza, you’re a former tag team champion with a decent reign and a run in a tournament. Like Rizza, you paired yourself up with someone more talented than you are – in this case, Kyle Shane, and in his, Tomoko Hanahara. Like Rizza, the moment that tag team ended, people really stopped giving a shit about you. #ShaneBetterHalf.
What I’m saying, Rod, is that you’re nothing. You’ve always been nothing, and you always will be nothing. Your greatest accomplishment is the fact that you get to look at the lights in Jocelyn Camden’s final wrestling match. That’s at least something, but no one will remember you for it. It’s ok, though – I’ll make it quick, and when we’re done, you can go back to selling autographs at conventions or whatever the fuck you do with your life now. Say Hi to Dr. Emo and Seth Stevens for me. Let Heat and Fire know they’re both still punk bitches. Anyone else you see on that “fight for sandwiches” tour, let them know I’m doing so much better than they are, but if they want to step up for another pay day, they can find my number. I’ll be in London. It won’t be hard to miss me – I’ll be on every television programme and bus stop advertisement in the city.
Oh, and one last thing. You’re welcome. You’re welcome for the nice meal you get to have because I decided to say “yes” to this match. You’re welcome for giving you a little extra exposure so you can slightly increase your booking rate for next weekend. You’re welcome for making you relevant again, because the world knows you could have been fighting Hawaiian Hardhead this weekend, and the entire crowd would have walked out to grab merch and take a piss. At least now they’ll get to see how much you suck.
Peace, bitch!